#The actual celeb collaboration we need

[emotinalsupportturtle]

Literally what society needs is Miles Kane and Noel Fielding going on a shopping spree and playing dress up. 10 seasons of that

[jewishbarbies]

Taylor would be what I’d consider a functioning alcoholic. A lot of people think alcoholism is like in the tv show Shameless where you are so drunk you don’t know where you are or how you got there. But there is (in my personal opinion) a much scarier form of alcoholism and that is where people can drink excessively and still function farely normally. Maybe with a slight hangover but they aren’t blacked out. They get up and go to work every day. Yet they’ll come home and drink numerous bottles every night as if it’s normal. That’s how I view Taylor. She functions relatively well for her industry even if she’s constantly drinking to cope with whatever issues she’s facing.

Not to mention people in this industry would be making sure she’s up and working because their livelihoods depend on her functioning. She very well could be struggling day in and out but she has a team of people that will make her look like she’s fine because they want to keep the cheques coming in.

I’m not a fan of her but I still want her to seek help. I think because of her brand her fans think she’s always great and she’d tell them when she’s not. Parasocial tendencies 101. But growing up in the 00s and seeing celebrities dragged down and brought back up publicly over and over again I know that anyone with good mental health would struggle and it’s pretty evident she doesn’t have good mental health. She needs therapy at the very least. Potentially rehab. Nowadays there is less public shaming and more collaboration with paparazzi and media. She’s not going to use them to show her reality. It would hurt her brand more than most other celebs because of how carefully it’s been curated. She has problems and needs professional help.

my uncle was a functioning alcoholic. my sister and I were around 8-9 when he drove us to his and my aunt’s house for a ‘vacation’ and he was drunk. he got pulled over for driving without a seatbelt a couple times, never for dui. he worked all day and was a higher up at his job while being absolutely shitfaced the entire time. it’s truly terrifying to think about all the things that could’ve happened, all the ways we’d been put in danger. my parents didn’t even know until years later even though he’d been at every family event plastered. you couldn’t tell he was drunk bc we never saw him sober and he never acted like you’d expect a drunk person to ask. he and my aunt divorced years ago and he’s allegedly still a drunk wherever he moved to.

it’s so, so serious and I can only imagine how hard it is to ask for help. but we, as a society, need to stop allowing celebrities to market actual alcoholism on a silver platter. we almost got rid of nicotine. let’s bring that energy to the fight against alcoholism.

[sparkliingdust]

I Love Taylor Swift....

But I feel like we can be fans of her without believing she is the epitome of perfection and pushing that mentality on other people. She is talented. She is hardworking. She is influential. But the stans have to learn to lay off. The behavior this summer is straight-up annoying, and honestly, we need to learn to acknowledge the mistakes she's made too.

Going to the Eras Tour Movie is not about us having or reliving the concert experience. We can't go in inconveniencing movie theatre employees and other theatres around us with noise complaints. It's great she made a movie. Let's dress up and given out friendship bracelets. But let's not cause a scene because we want to poorly scream shout songs. This reminds me of when newer or other artists release music around when she has a release, and they end up getting buried on social media or streaming. Like other people can prosper on the charts too. Like we don't have to keep proving to her how much we love her. She should know by now.

Taylor's dancers, back-up singers, and fans going to see Beyonce did not betray Taylor and deserve to be fired or aren't real fans. Stop trying to cancel everyone who varies outside of Taylor's circle. We can support more than one artist.

As a fandom we are more than aware that Taylor's had to repeatedly show her songwriting abilities so she isn't discredited. Why can't we show Olivia Rodrigo the same courtesy and understanding? Her whole career shouldn't be taken down because her team admitted that two songs were 'inspired' by Taylor (whether Deja Vu actually sounds like Cruel Summer is open to your ears interpretation). The appropriate credit was given as well as 50% royalties (which is just insane). That doesn't mean root through every album Olivia makes and try to tie to other songs. It's disappointing that Jack had to get out and explain what was going on, and Taylor hasn't said a peep yet.

Taylor has a weak history working with women in music. She's worked very little with female producers as consistently as Aaron and Jack, and female artists have been used as back-up vocals more compared to male artists who are featured on the actual track. And she has publicly supported younger rising artists very prominently during a promo tour of sorts and then goes completely silent - Olivia Rodrigo, IceSpice during the whole ratty situation, Hayley Kiyoko for reputation/allyship promo tour, etc. She is a force of nature in the music industry, but I do think she could publicly clean up her image supporting female artists and not when it's to her own benefit.

Miss Americana did not age well at all. Instead of letting reputation exist without an explanation, she was a part of an entire documentary of how she was cancelled (and wrongfully so), but then turned it into her becoming an activist that went nowhere. Sitting on your couch with your publicist in a huge mansion toasting the resistance with champagne over a social media post, and then never following up on it, is completely peak white feminism. Some celebs are not cut out for adding activism into the career. Okay. But she should've done the work before stepping into the arena using the LGBTQ+ community in a music video to prove that she's always been an ally because Todrick didn't know how she'd react to having a gay kid is not it.

GrammyGate. Joe was listed as William Bowery for two songs on Folklore. After it won Album of the Year, he was changed to a producer to six songs and that qualified him to win a Grammy. She did reveal that he was William in the long pond sessions but the proper paperwork wasn't submitted/finalized until eight months after the album came out - where he could've been properly credited as a collaborator. And now with the Eras Tour and Joe/Taylor has broken up, she switches back and forth to say she wrote Betty on her own, and everything came out of her imagination. Why all of the shenanigans for a bright shiny award??

I know all of this makes it sound like I hate Taylor, but I don't. I'm practically known as the resident Swiftie everywhere I hang out/work because I'm always bringing her up in one way or another. But she's not perfect, and I'm super freaking tired of being in a fandom that refuses to not acknowledge anything slightly questionable that's she done. We're canceling her or dragging her down - it just means we're able to see she's not infallible and love her despite of her mistakes.

[sexysaltine]

fashion rant brought to you from my notes app

Pharrell Williams at Louis Vuitton: i have thoughts

I was pleasantly surprised by the collection and of course I love a spectacle but I just can't get past the celebrity of it all.

included pics of my favorites

I guess I'm just one of those pretentious snobs that thinks celebrities shouldn't just be given jobs in fashion. They aren't fucking qualified. People go to school for this, put in a lot of work. It's one thing to do a line, like beyoncé's ivy park, where it's kind of like having a ghostwriter do your memoir, a celebrity puts their name on it but there's a design team doing most of the real work with the celeb advising. Having a celeb be creatively in charge of a heritage brand? That is a whole different story.

It's the same ick I have for people who call themselves designers but don't know how to sew. You have to understand how clothes are constructed in order to design, and you should have some actual experience in the fashion industry if you wanna be a creative director.

but apparently not i guess, if you're famous enough.

And we'll never know exactly how much of what we see on the runways is designed by Pharrell. We'll never know if he just contributed a few basic ideas or if he actually fully embodies the role of creative director. The PR will always do whatever it can to make it look like Pharrell is fully committed to this and doing the work. This is a big job, one that comes with an immense amount of pressure and stress. This is a job that can have a dire effect, sucking the life out of some, or sending some to rehab (marc jacob's for example, former creative director of LV) and working people to death. Pharrell has really no risk involved in this, if he crashes and burns he will be absolutely fine and no one will really remember that weird time when Pharrell tried to be a fashion designer.

There's also a lot of Chanel referencing... Like of course there is, it makes sense but i'm not happy about it. Just anything related to Chanel at this point gives me an ick. Pharrell was a face of Chanel under Karl Lagerfeld and the two constantly collaborated so it makes sense that that style would be engrained in his aesthetic as a designer.

However purely from an aesthetic perspective, Chanel has been doing what Chanel does since the 80s when Karl took over. They've been doing the same fucking thing stylistically for forever. So why do we need more of that? Why bring that into an unrelated heritage brand that neither Coco or Karl ever had anything to do with. Why flood the luxury market with the same stuff your competitor is not only known for, but constantly criticized for, causing them to be labeled as boring or outdated? Does the world need more Chanel suits? because I think if someone wanted a Chanel suit, they would just go to Chanel.

Aesthetic aside, let Chanel fucking die already. Both her and Karl sucked and we should stop ignoring that.

All that being said I was pleasantly surprised by the collection. Camo of any kind is not for me but there is a customer for that. The accessories stood out, as they should for a brand like LV. and if Pharrell knows how to do one thing it's put on a show and that he did. It was a star-studded massive production and those are fun.

[ear-worthy]

New Year's Resolution: Fewer Celebrity Interview Podcasts

Remember the good old days on TV and radio when celebrities were interviewed by people trained to ask questions in a public forum? Ah, the old days. A troubling and annoying trend in podcasting is the growth of celebrity interview shows. These shows are like Japanese Barberry, Purple Loosestrife, and Kudzu.

That leads me to the announcement that "Television personality" Rachel Leviss, together with iHeartPodcasts, are premiering “Rachel Goes Rogue” on January 8, 2024. Rachel Goes Rogue will be executive produced by iHeartPodcasts and Bethenny Frankel and the “Just B” Podcast Network.

The people at iHeart wrote this: "After navigating through a tumultuous year of intense public scrutiny, Rachel has emerged resilient and committed to personal growth. As the host of Rachel Goes Rogue, Leviss will lean into her journey and connect with listeners in a whole new way."

To be fair, the show could be terrific, yet does podcasting truly need another show with a Reality TV celebrity oversharing about their randy, chaotic and overdramatized life?

It's just that every celebrity with a little time on their hands has plunged into the interview podcast pool, and all that splashing has listeners wondering how they ended in the deep end of this ego-stroking pool.

Celebrity podcasts have overwhelmed the sea wall built to protect listeners from celebrity self-love, self-absorption, and self-actualization.

We had the heavy hitters like Meghan Markle in Archetypes and Michelle Obama, who were here and are now gone. Then, we have the lesser-known celebs like Justin Long, Gwyneth Paltrow (Goop -- Heaven help us), and Seth Rogen.

It's not that all of these celebrity podcasts are bad -- except for Snooki & Joey -- but like true-crime podcasts, there are just too many of them.

There are so many of these podcasts that there is a podcast called the Celebrity Podcast Podcast that covers celebrity podcasts. Talk about meta.

So I know what you're saying? What's your problem?

After all, broadcast TV has lovable trash like The Bachelor and Bachelorette and The Masked Singer. Discovery has an entire channel dedicated to skewering humanity with shows like 1000-lb Sisters and MILF Manor (jeez).

No problem. To each their own. But TV also has Abbott Elementary, Ghosts, Yellowstone, and 60 Minutes.

My problem is that I'm frightened that podcasting will be the recycling plant for celebrities disgraced and seeking redemption, or those with fading careers inundating the medium. Podcasting already has a problem with the conspiracy theorists, misinformation mavens, and true-crime obsessives overwhelming podcast feeds.

Take, for example, the new podcast by T.J. Holmes and Amy Robach, formerly of ABC's Good Morning America. The podcast premiered on December 5 on the iHeartPodcast Network. In addition to hosting and executive producing their own podcast, Robach and Holmes will also collaborate on a full slate of upcoming programming for iHeartPodcasts.

Here's the marketing promotion from iHeart: "Hosts and executive producers Robach and Holmes are a formidable broadcasting team with decades of experience delivering headline news and captivating viewers nationwide. Now, the duo will get behind the microphone to explore meaningful conversations about current events, pop culture, and everything in between. Nothing is off limits"

Does the off limits include interviews with their ex-spouses so they get to tell their side of the story? So, the duo are temporarily persona non grata on television, and some agent said, "I know. Start a podcast."

Podcasting, like TV and radio, is a zero-sum game. We are definitely seeing that now in streaming TV, where execs just woke up and realized streaming isn't a moneymaker. Suddenly, streamers like Netflix and Max are canceling or removing shows faster than Taylor Swift can take over the entire world.

In podcasting, there are some terrific interview shows. Fresh Air, WTF with Marc Maron, How I Built This, Vox Conversations, Jemele Hill Is Unbothered, The Jordan Harbinger Show, and so many more.

How about Shannen Doherty? The “Beverly Hills, 90210” "Charmed" actor, 52, debuted the new iHeartRadio podcast “Let’s Be Clear with Shannen Doherty��� last month, which covers many aspects of her life, both professional and personal. Doherty has stage four cancer.

Doherty told People Magazine in an interview published on Tuesday that those aspects will include her experiences living with cancer, and that it will “explore all the different phases and stages” of the disease, including “what it’s like to lose your hair (a) multitude of times, (and) how to stay authentic to yourself.”

Doherty, in that People Magazine interview, explained that doctors will be among the guests she speaks to, and that the podcast is encouraging her on her journey, calling it “invigorating” and saying it “helps me for sure.”

Now, that's a celebrity podcast that has value because it's about a life we may someday face ourselves, and the courage displayed in the battle.

With Spotify and other networks pulling back on money and resources for podcasting, every new celebrity podcast means one less potential quality podcast from a person listeners have not yet heard of.

How many is too many? Sometimes, it seems like every celebrity has a podcast. Does a celebrity on a reality show who became famous for "Karen" behavior really deserve a podcast? And isn't that podcast going to crowd out the aspirational podcasters who start their own interview shows without the spotlight of having received a rose ten years ago on a reality TV show?

Marc Maron was not a celebrity when he started his podcast out of his garage. Believe it or not, Joe Rogan was simply a former reality show TV host when he started his podcast.

Are all those celebrity podcasts flooding the podcasting space, crowding out the potential for unknowns to surface and become household names? Is podcasting becoming Kardashian-ized like reality TV?

It's bad enough that Dr. Phil has a podcast. So, no more TV castoffs and celebrity laughingstocks on podcasts. If celebrities are sliding into podcasting, please make it people like Julia Louis Dreyfuss, Lupita Nyong'o, and Emma Watson.

For me, the best celebrity podcast is Clear+Vivid with Alan Alda. Smart, intellectually curious, and far-ranging, the show is, as one reviewer commented, "The perfect mix of insightful and humanistic conservation."

On the latest episode, Alda interviews Steve Inskeep about his new book about Abraham Lincoln. The new book takes a fresh look at Abraham Lincoln’s life by recounting sixteen face-to-face encounters Lincoln had with people who differed with him, sometimes vehemently. The book not only reveals his skills as a master politician in a deeply divisive time, but also has lessons for today.

Hey, I understand if you are fascinated by the sexual goings-on with Good Morning America or Vanderpump Rules. Human beings are naturally curious, especially about other people's business when other people are getting busy with each other.

But are these frolics worthy of a podcast? Maybe a few episodes, and then you move on to some terrific podcasts that are gossipy, creepy, and trashy by definition, and they're by indie podcasters.

Try Trashy Divorces or What a Creep. You can still get the dirt without getting dirty.

[struggle-but-its-all-ocean-floor]

Aren’t you tired of bringing Jimin’s name every time you want to talk about something problematic? The other guy from the collab clearly said they didn’t know who else was going to be on the song. You sound like an anti since it’s something they like to hold against him. Yes, the collab is still there and I don’t like it too but it’s not the same as situations when people are aware. You are using him to defend someone else without bringing the context

I didn't know the Angel Pt. 1 artists weren't aware of who they were collabing with beforehand, but that's beside the point. Did Jungkook know that dancer was a Zionist before he was hired? Probably not. Did Jungkook handpick? Probably not. I'm not even sure he got Brian onboard and he was the only dancer Jungkook was already a fan of.

Also, the fact that those artists accepted a collaboration about which they knew nothing about doesn't exempt them from responsibility. It's just business, but if you make a blind deal because you think it's a good opportunity, and you don't care about quality or anything else, and the other parties turn out to suck, blame's on you. We can blame Hybe for this, but Jimin probably agreed to it. He probably assumed the other artists would be good, or trusted Hybe. Either way, I don't think he's fully exempt from responsibility. And JK is a big artist too. Doing background checks isn't his job exactly, but everyone who works with him and for him represents him, so he should be careful as well. BTS are public figures - their own words -, and if they choose to not do certain things because of it, then being careful about who they associate with, at least professionally, should be part of that.

I don't even blame Jimin that much, because I honestly assumed he didn't know the guy was a rapist. I thought he knew who he would be working with, but doubted he'd go further than listening to some of his tracks. Again, that doesn't exempt him from responsibility.

If I sound like an anti, maybe you're too defensive. Which context is needed here? What's the difference between Jungkook working with a dancer who turned out to be a Zionist, BTS collabing with multiple problematic celebs like Nick Minaj and Snoop Dog, and Jimin singing in Angel Pt.1? You think BTS chose those collabs? It's much more likely that they were told about them. In the context of my answer, I think it was fair to mention Jimin. It's also one of the most recent examples I can think of.

Didn't Jimin say he liked Chris Brown and recommended his songs - more recently, not when he was a trainee? (Jungkook too actually) You think Jimin hasn't expressed admiration for tons of trashy people? Like MJ, who, for some reason, everyone stills loves. My only question is whether they are truly unaware that those celebs are problematic or if they choose to "separate the art from the artist".

[newsworld-nw]

Kristen Stewart shares where she and fiancé Dylann Meyer stand on their wedding plans

Kristen Stewart has been spilling the beans about her upcoming nuptials to fiancé Dylan Meyer, and it reveals twilight The star has a culinary twist in thoughts for her massive day. Stewart, who's there? First point out his want Celeb chef Man Fieri, officiating at his marriage ceremony, lately shared extra about why he is passionate concerning the concept.Throughout an look on Thursday's episode Watch what occurs dwell With Andy Cohen, Stewart elaborated on his alternative of officer. "Oh, we've got the identical vogue sense and hair," she quipped. "Additionally, I believe he looks like a very nice man and he marries a number of bizarre individuals."After discovering Fieri had already officiated at a number of LGBTQ+ weddings, Stewart could not include her pleasure. "Man? My man? Are you kidding me?" he exclaimed. Stephanie Keenan/VF22/WireImage for Self-importance HonestThe Dine, drive-in and dive The house aspect confirmed their willingness to carry out and Stewart responded with gusto. "They got here up and so they have been like, 'You already know, we're down for it,'" he recalled. "And I used to be like, 'Me too, however, like, I am dangerous at planning. So, I am going to hit you quickly.'"Nevertheless, Stewart hinted that he and Meyer might go for a extra intimate marriage ceremony. "I believe we're most likely going to marry one another," she added, "after which name Man and say, 'You have been right here in spirit, child.'"When it got here to setting their marriage ceremony date, Stewart was tight-lipped. "I do not know," the actress replied. "We'll shock ourselves." She initially expressed her want to serve Fieri shortly after saying her engagement to Meyer in November 2021.Mike Coppola/Getty Photographs"We now have, like, nobody—we're simply going to do it ourselves and simply, like, add one other occasion to our second, no officers to choose," he shared throughout an look. The Howard Stern Present In November 2021. "However we heard that Man Fieri of the Meals Community officiates a number of same-sex weddings. And so the thought of ​​that man — that candy, candy spiky-headed man coming to our marriage ceremony and officiating, it makes me snicker a lot."In an interview in February 2022 Self-importance HonestThe spencer The star revealed that he and Meyer, a screenwriter, are engaged on a TV venture collectively. Stewart is meant to work on the present, however she did not trouble at first as a result of there was some concern that working collectively may "go sideways" on the connection.Backgrid"You don't need that to have an effect on this lovely relationship you will have," Stewart instructed the outlet. Lastly, Stewart and Meyer (weak half, XOXO, Miss 2059) trusted their relationship and unlocked a energy collectively within the technique of writing the primary episode that existed between them as collaborators."Like we found a superbrain," he stated. "He is a very, actually sensible f**king screenwriter."That superbrain -- mixed with their love and respect for one another -- is why Stewart is having fun with the experience of her life off the massive display screen."I like being engaged," Stewart stated. "It is totally different.… I simply really feel very pleased and fortunate."Associated Content material: #Kristen #Stewart #shares #fiancé #Dylann #Meyer #stand #marriage ceremony #plans Read the full article

[hollywoodfamerp]

HEY FAMERS!

It’s that time of year again! On August 28th, our annual Hollywood Fame Music Festival will be coming to a dash near you and we need to know a few things! If you would like your celeb to perform at the festival then please send us an IM to reserve your spot! If your FC is part of a band - please specify in the IM if you’d like to perform solo or with their band! Also, let us know if you’d like to do a musical collaboration with another artist or dancer! Like last year, we are creating promotionals and flyers for every artist performing as well as presenters! Every year gets better nd better when it comes to collaborations so we are excited to see what you all come up with. This is open to EVERYONE in the group, regardless if they are a singer or musical artist. In the past, we had dancers do their first ever solo singing performance and we’ve even had actors perform on stage for their very first time in their career. It’s all up to you on what you want your FC to do! Please be sure to IM the main by AUGUST 9TH with your FC’s name and act!

Just as important as performers, we need PRESENTERS! So all you actors, actress’, YouTubers, models, dancers, and/or other singers who don’t want to actually perform - we need you! Every year we have presenters come up with cute and creative ways to introduce the performances and we LOVE to see the time and effort they put into their posts. Think of the person who introduces a celeb on the Grammy’s before they perform! If you want your FC to introduce a specific act then please let us know that otherwise we will be generating random pairs for the introductions. 

REMEBER! This event is mandatory to every FC in the group so even if your FC isn’t set to perform or introduce a performer, they will be there in attendance! Whether you’d like your celeb to participate as a performer or presenter is entirely up to you. An in detailed post about the festival will be coming ASAP that will answer any more questions you may have so keep your eyes open for that!

PLEASE HAVE ALL IMS SENT TO THE MAIN SPECIFYING IF YOU’D LIKE YOUR CELEB TO PRESENT OR PERFORM BY AUGUST 9TH!

*Please like this notice so we know you’re all aware!

[czedwardsblog]

WELCOME HOME, O TWITTER REFUGEE! I'm a very grumpy tumblr old, and i often talk about people getting off my lawn, but you are welcome here. Do look up some of the PSA posts explaining how tumblr works. We are a huge collaborative goofy community with quite dark humor going on. QUICK START GUIDE TO HOW THE COMMUNITY WORKS! In brief - and there is so much more to know than this - (a) Liking posts DOES NOTHING for anybody. (b) Reblogging (the little recycling arrow) is the key for sharing what you like. If you like art or writing, ALWAYS REBLOG IT, otherwise you're not spreading the word about the work, you're just putting a heart sticker on a piece of paper that probably the artist or writer really doesn't need & instead of being encouragement, it makes them sad. Like they're a secret lover you're ashamed to admit you know in public or something. (c) Curate your experience actively - anybody that seems to be a bot (there are ways to identify them so you can BLOCK ON SIGHT - & you'll want to block them because they get their legitimacy for search engines by following REAL BLOGS LIKE YOURS - don't feed the bots), anybody that gets nasty on your post on your blog - oh heck no you don't need that you're here to relax and have a chill time. BLOCK ANYBODY WHO IS HARSHING YOUR VIBE! Seriously, if they don't know you, and you don't have a bond of any sort, don't let them keep flailing at you, you're awesome and deserve a safe-feeling online experience. (3) ahahah oh yes, d which is typed 3, classic. To minimize abusive asks (this is an ask) turn off the anonymous ask option. Its amazing how few people will abuse you when their behavior is posted for everyone to see the moment you answer. This is the hangout for the weird kids. Expect the unexpected. Find joy in the many posts reminding people to take their meds, drink water, go outside and engage with nature - no pics or it didn't happen, are you breathing? the nature folx, we've got actual celebs on here, but most of them are stealth - not Neil Gaiman, though, he's real and his blog is obviously his and he has repeatedly attempted to prove it. We don't have verified accounts here. You won't know how popular or powerful someone is (thereby making nobody particularly powerful at all) here. We just play in the ballpit here and riff on what each other says. I hope you like it here. Also, EPIC BLOG! WELCOME WELCOME WELCOME! Oh hey, I like your shoelaces (yes, do look that up!)

Um, yeah? Thanks.

[kicksaddictny]

Kicksaddict Sneakerhead PROFILES Interview Series: @CakedaGawd

After a long Hiatus, we’ve returned! Our popular Profile series has been requested almost on a daily basis (Thanks for the tweets, dms and emails). We were even threatened! (Thanks by the way).

Cake The Gawd! This one was so much fun. Tap in.

Where are you from? Brooklyn, NY born in Crown Heights raised in East Flatbush.

How long have you been collecting sneakers? I was introduced to sneakers in 1991 but I started collecting for myself in 98.

What’s your favorite sneaker and why? Air Jordan 6 Infrared. It's the shoe Michael was wearing when he won his first championship, and to me just it’s just the most beautiful Jordan shoe to date! The silhouette is unmatched, it is timeless, and no matter how many times it is retroed I will buy it!

Besides your hometown, what is the best city for sneakerheads that you know of? Why? I would say LA 100% !! It is a vibe out there. I am part of a sneaker group and 75% of the people in there are from LA. They really about the culture they know their shit and they are fresh as fuck too.

Do you collect just for collecting or do you collect and rock? I collect and rock. That is why I double up on certain shoes.. Some kicks you gotta have for store and show but some you just have to rock them!

What sneaker got you into the sneaker game? I cannot pinpoint one thing, it is so many things. It was Music, my parents introducing me to Nike, my older cousin, basketball, the dope boys around the way, and my 3rd grade crush and her cousin who both had Aqua 8's. (LOL) I cannot just say 1 thing because they all had a significant part in it.

What are your thoughts on these fake celebrity sneakerheads? I hate them all! All of these dudes just get perks, some of them do not even know the shoes. That shit really gets under my skin. Showing off shoes that they get and not even knowing the name or numbers of the shoes, creating their own names. Shit is sickening. S/O to the Sneaker Gawd Wale !

How do you feel about the Off white collabs? I liked the first round of the collabs. With the Presto's, Air maxes, Blazers, and Jordan 1's. I think after that it should've been left alone. But I can respect what they are doing over there. I just won my first pair of Off-White's with the Lot 50 joint.

If you could wear only one sneaker for the rest of your life, what would it be? Air Jordan 3 Black Cement. Yes 6's are my favorite of all time but the Black Cement 3's just go with EVERYTHING!

What advice would you give as far as storing and preservation of your sneakers? Wear your kicks man. I store and rock! I get it, wanting to save shoes but putting them away and never rocking them, when you finally do ya it’s separating and crumbling. In order for your kicks to last they gotta be worn anyway. Unless you're truly just on some collecting only for show vibes.

What is the most you’ve ever spent on a pair of sneakers? $900... I was able to land Black and Red and Royal 1's from 2001 together. A friend of mine had them and said he couldn't think of anyone else. I had literally just started my new job. A chunk of my first check went to that pick up.

Have you ever waited in line for a pair of kicks? I waited in line once in my life for shoes and swore I would never do it again. It was for the 2001 True Blue 3's. I waited online at like 7 in the morning at Kings Plaza. LMAO I said this will never happen again. I didn't have the patience for it. I do not know how ppl used to do that shit or camp for kicks. I was there for 1 hour and I was like this is ridiculous.

You're also a photographer, how long have you been taking photos? I have been taking photos since 2011 but officially became a photographer in 2013.

How do sneakers play a role in your photography? That is a great question because I didn't want the 2 to mix at all. Because I'm a scenery and landscape photographer. But I got into photography because of sneakers. No offense to anyone but a bunch of these  "influencers" get on IG with their DSLR cameras, take some on foot shots and call themselves "Photographers". 90% of them do not even understand lighting. I didn't wanna be one of those guys because I actually live this and study it. But recently I just started letting it be that and owning it. I am nice with this photography shit when it comes to sneakers. I have a deep connection with shoes and I love incorporating that into my art. I thank my wife for that. I told her I don't wanna be just another sneaker photographer and she said to me who said you have to be ?! I took that and ran with it. Off-White just recently featured some of my pictures on their Instagram.

I remember you saying you're a sneaker enthusiast, what is the difference between that and a sneakerhead? An enthusiast really studies sneakers. Sneakerheads just love sneakers like it ain't really about the history and all that for them. They just love shoes because it is cool and makes them feel good. Us Enthusiasts are invested. Things matter like knowing years of a shoe. For example, an enthusiast would look at a pair of Jordan's like Taxi 12's, We know Michael wore those in the 1996 - 97 season, but we also know that Martin gave away a pair on his show for the Christmas episode to the kid who had holes in shoes. They are tied to iconic moments. A sneakerhead may love Bordeaux 7's because they are dope looking shoes. Where for me it's that Michael Jordan wore those in a video with Michael Jackson and Kris Kross in the 92 Jam video. MJ and MJ in a video with Kris Kross, do you know what that did to my childhood?! Give you one more example that is not even Michael Jordan related. Piggy backing off of Kris Kross,The Patrick Ewing’s were one of my favorite kicks growing up besides seeing Pat play in them one of my favorite Hip Hop covers of all time is "Totally Krossed Out" and Kris Kross is wearing both colorways. So you see what I mean there is so much tied to it with being an enthusiast. This is just my opinion though some may not agree so don't shoot me! (Ha)

From the time you started collecting up until now, would you say that the sneaker game changed for the best or the worst? I have been collecting for 20 plus years now. I have seen the game at it's best, I have seen it die, I have seen it revive, and now I am witnessing the death of it again. The sneaker game is disgusting right now, and I honestly do not think it will ever recover. It really saddens me. It is a popularity and money contest right now.

Does pricing affect your collection? Hell No! And I hate that some people are trying to make this the norm. IDGAF if you paid $500 - $2000 for a pair, It doesn't mean shit.  The narrative is getting outta hand.

What does the word “Hypebeast” mean to you? Hypebeast is a person that only buys shit for status and popularity. They cannot form their own opinion about shit. They have to wear and cop items based on what every celeb is wearing or whatever these Social Media "Influencers" are saying is hot! It is not only sneaker related either. N*ggaz were hypebeasting for PS5 last year..

What are your thoughts on the females in the sneaker game? They are the best! I wish we had a Sneaker union and it was only run by females! The men in this game are annoying and so over the top. It is so bad that they feel the need to compete with women. The men get shoes just to show off to one another. Like what type of shit is that? The females are cool. I had a dude on twitter tell me women don't know the value of a shoe let alone about the shoe. The men feel like they always gotta try to shit on the women. The women are just trying to be part of the culture and enjoy it. And they shouldn't have to try to be part of something that is open to anyone who is willing to be invested and understand the culture.

Any advice for a young kid coming up in the sneaker game? Wear what you like! Respect the game and the people who have been doing it before you. Because this new generation of sneakerheads are little entitled dicks. No respect whatsoever!! I don't care about Travis Scott shoes. Without Jordan being who he is Travis wouldn't have a Jordan silhouette to collaborate with! Same with Off-White. These silhouettes were here before these guys. Say know your history and pay homage!! BUT STAY humble.

See I follow you and I'm loving the way you include your daughter in your work, what does that mean to you? Man, it is beautiful!!!! Without even trying she is invested in the culture. Both photography and shoes. Myself and my wife are both heavy into photography, art, music, sneakers, and clothes. My daughter is into all the same things but we are letting it be her own experience. We are not forcing anything on her. We want her to enjoy being a child and whatever things she picks up from us along the way is just a bonus. But I love shooting her, and I love when she asks myself and her mother "do we like her fit". It is truly a blessing man!

All photos by CAKEDAGAWD

Follow : https://twitter.com/CakedaGawd 

https://www.instagram.com/whatsinthesyrup/

[ronwhitenetworthsblog]

Ron white net worth

Ron white net worth-

Release-Ron white net worth internet worth is roughly $40 million by 2021. 

Ronald “Ron” Whitened-decorated is definitely an American endure-upcomedian and actor, and publisher from Tx.

Bright white-shaded is best known as charter man or woman in not anywhere Collar Humorous Tour. Nicknamed “Tater Salad”, Ron white net worth the writer from your publication ‘I Possessed the expert to be Noiseless Even so I Did not Hold the Ability’.

Very early Existence

Ronald Dee White colored-decorated was designed round the 18th of December, 1956 in Fritch, Tx. White-colored-decorated could possibly be the son to Charles Don Bright white-colored and Barbara Joan Craig.

From your fresh age, his goal would be to grow to be comedian. He resided in Mexico for a short period and purchased a pottery factory there before coming back towards the U.S. to pursue comedy.

Occupation

From Your thirty days of jan 2000 via March 2003, White-colored-coloured toured with Shaun Foxworthy, Expenses Engvall, and Ray the Wire Man as part of the Azure Collar Funny Journey - a movements photo that provided out over the You . s . States in around 90 metropolitan areas and grossed over $15 million.

In 2005, The WB Tv Circle aired the pilot for that Ron Whitened-tinted Show, a selection show that combined numerous celebritycameos and cartoons, and drawings. He recorded several instances of The Gong Demonstrate with Dave Attell among the list of celeb idol judges.

This Holiday Season, Ron Bright white-coloured and manufacturer Michael Blakey (Marketing Professional) designed Organica Class (OMG), a label that encourages each rising and set up musicians and comedians. OMG proven that it could possibly discharge all White’s future Dvd videos and CDs.

In November 2015, Whitened-decorated announced he was operating for Director from your You . s . Suggests as an independent aspirant in 2016. The year after, White colored-decorated made an appearance as Phil, veteran road director for the imaginary Staton-Residence Band, throughout the Showtime series Roadies.

Ron White’s internet worth is $40 million by 2021.

Illustrates

In this article are the most effective popular highlights of Ron White’s vocation:

1.They Phone Me “Tater Salad” (Video, 2004)

2.A Little Bit Not professional (Movie, 2012)

Favored Prices from Ron White-coloured

“Years back, because i was seeing a baseball game between your Baltimore Orioles as well as Tx Rangers, I remember shopping in amazement at Cal Ripken. I identified in this video game that ‘you do not need to be flashy’ and possess ‘power numbers’ in becoming excellent. Durable the straightforward items that could be challenging stuff. Sturdy management, function ethic and determination.” - Ron White-colored-colored

“The arresting specialist, who I’d literally known, my living. What happens I am speaking about? He or she resided a number of doorways lower the path me, inside of a capital of scotland- less than 400 people. *We’ve satisfied.* Now, he adopts me to jail, and this he asks me generally have aliases. And This I only decided to be being a intelligent-bum, and therefore i reported, “Yeah. They contact me, “Tater Salad! ” 17 many years in the future, I am handcuffed around the counter in New You can actually with blood stream developing out of my nasal area, which cop proceeds, “Are you Ron ‘Tater Salad’ White colored-coloured? ” - Ron Bright white-coloured

“People claim that I’m an alcoholic, and it is not correct, since i only take in immediately after i operate, and I am a workaholic.” - Ron White-colored

“In Tx, we’ve the dying punishment, and it is employed by us. In fact. In case you reached Texas and destroy an individual, we will kill you rear.” - Ron Bright white-decorated

“Everything creative is variety of collaborative. It had been collaborative on some level if you are a someone and designer stretches your canvas. I believe all of us interact on some level, but typically, we’re by ourselves.” - Ron White-colored

3 Solid Instruction from Ron Whitened-shaded

Now you understand about Ron White’s world wide web well worth, and just how he achieved success let us take a look at a number of the most potent training we are able to review from him:

1. Acquire Your self

Help with the cash to understand and also be towards your ability to succeed if it’s for the future. You should be intelligent with regards to your alternatives.

2. Appears Never Issue

Obsessing above one’s real appearance will allow you to using a head-chase which can hardly ever cause you to feel happy with your picture. Instead, accept on your own while you are. You are a lot more lovely than you imagine.

3. Don’t Obsess With Unfavorable Strength From Some others

Once they consider it chances are they don’t mean it and can be sorry later. Always forgive.

Conclusion

Ron White-decorated is usually a Grammy-nominated actor and comedian who’s most well-known for signing up for not anywhere Collar Humorous Excursion. White-colored-tinted was nominated for any Grammy Honor to get the best Humorous Record in 2014 for just about any Tiny Not professional.

Ron White’s internet worth is roughly $40 million by 2021.

More Info-

https://digitalvisi.com/ron-white-net-worth/ 

[hoochy-coo]

What are your thoughts on Vogue and tiktokers/influencers? I completely understand collaborating with Emma Chamberlain who has expressed a love for fashion and basically set the trends for the past three years. But random tiktokers? I can understand wanting to grab the attention of a younger demographic, but at what cost? Now with Gigi’s bland cover, they need to get whoever is in charge of American Vogue out of there lmao.

US Vogue is so out of touch lmao 

I understand that as a publication they need to evolve with what the GP wants but Vogue used to inform the public of what’s trendy, what’s in and out, and what they should be paying attention to. Now, they’re just blindly following what’s popping on social media. Which is redundant imo, because if Vogue is just going to cater to that then why do even bother keeping up with them if we can just scroll through our IG? lmao

I get that it’s a business at the end of the day and tiktokers/influencers will undoubtedly bring them clout, but are avid readers of Vogue interested in Addison Rae or Charli or Dixie or whoever is doing renegade on tiktok? Probably not. Those tiktokers attract kids and teens, who are turning to snapchat to get their celeb news. I feel like Vogue is not the right publication for these influencers anyway, if anything they should be aiming to do interviews and shoots with Seventeen or Elle or even Teen Vogue. At least those magazines are aimed at their target demographic. I can’t see any teens atm running out to buy a copy of Vogue because their fave tiktoker is on the cover. They’ll just hit like on IG and keep it moving. Idk how Vogue thinks this will actually work when they’re advertising La Mer $100 anti-aging face cream and Fendi purses in the same issue as the one with an editorial of these tween influencers on it? It’s so contradicting and they’re gonna end up grabbing to no one as well as losing their current readers. 

Gigi cover was just tragic. So was Kamala’s. Some of the outfits didn’t even fit these women right and if that’s not sloppy, then idk what is. 

[israeloctave1]

Weston Charm Center.

Fat Freezing Or Fat Loss? The Best In Body Contouring

Content

Do You Reduce Weight With Fat Freezing?

What Can Individuals Anticipate Throughout A Fat Freezing Therapy?

Treatment Overview.

A very unusual autoimmune disease in which red blood cells are harmed throughout exposure to cool. Most individuals resume their regular everyday activities quickly after each treatment. Customers do not require to be sedated or anesthetized before the treatment. Exercise or workout is beneficial on all levels for overall health and also weight administration.

Complying with a Cryolipolysis therapy there is no downtime or recovery period and also clients can normally resume their day to day tasks promptly. This is Including your Online Theory Study, Study and also end examination. You will simply require to see to it you are drinking plenty of water after your therapy to assist the Lymphatic system recede the toxic substances. Our knowledgeable as well as specialist personnel are here to address your inquiries and also deal with you to create a treatment plan that's right for you. One therapy is typically enough to get a fantastic durable outcome as well as usually will cause a 20-30% reduction in adipose tissue. If you disable this cookie, we will certainly not be able to save your choices.

Do You Slim Down With Fat Freezing?

Please talk with among our specialists regarding your objectives and what you can anticipate from your therapy. The specialist works a sophisticated probe over the picked area, using vacuum suction which creates a cozy and then a cold feeling as the treatment works. Using the power of reduced temperature levels, this treatment aims to help contour bodies when utilized along with a healthy and balanced way of living. You might have just one bothersome location that may need just one treatment session. You may have more than one issue area that may require treatment or may need greater than one therapy in a particular area to accomplish your preferred objective. You will deal with your doctor to make a plan-- and also the number of treatment sessions-- that will certainly best meet your wanted objectives. An unusual problem in which the skin develops red, itchy spots after exposure to cool temperature levels.

New Body-Shaping Spa Treatments Promise to Destroy Fat and Shed Inches Without Surgery - Connecticut Magazine

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Posted: Wed, 16 Jan 2019 08:00:00 GMT [source]

We can keep our prices a lot more affordable as we are a mobile facility as well as do not have the monetary concern of premises as well as all the price that choose it. Once you are cleared up right into your treatment you can picked to do whatever you like as long as you stay on the treatment bed. You can unwind and also check out, perform some work on your phone or perhaps conversation to your therapist. Nonetheless, we suggest that you take this possibility to fully unwind, pay attention to some music and take a well was entitled to nap. We can offer you our word that this treatment actually does work and has durable outcomes. It is not a con or a slendering misconception, this is a scientifically, tried, checked as well as shown treatment. No supplements or diet plan are needed for this form of therapy.

What Can Clients Expect Throughout A Fat Freezing Treatment?

This implies that every single time you see this site you will certainly require to allow or disable cookies once more. Purely Required Cookie should be made it possible for at all times so that we can save your choices for cookie setups.

Which is better CoolSculpting or Venus Freeze?

lipo360.co.uk’s free cryolipolysis portsmouth between the two technologies, “Coolsculpting actually destroys the fat cells. The Venus Freeze does not destroy fat cells, it does reduce fat cells, but what the Venus Freeze is best for is stimulating collagen and promoting skin tightening.”

The YES VISAGE facilities have the largest as well as most comprehensive variety of treatments. Zeltiq Coolsculpting cryolipolysis is the only pain-free liposuction surgery method authorized by the most stringent authority for the control and also efficiency of clinical devices - the US FDA. The YES VISAGE facilities use the trademarked clinical tool Zeltiq Coolsculpting. A cutting edge LED light therapy device which is verified to revitalize skin and also boost one of the most problematic skin disease. One of the most advanced Fat Freezing device offered today, featuring 360 ° cooling applicators and also advanced Quattro technology. After years of study, you can feel confident that the CoolSculpting ® procedure is based upon clinical proof. Professional research study assessing the efficacy as well as safety and security of CoolSculpting ® has actually generated 52 magazines on the subject.

Treatment Guide.

Your consent is needed for Allergan to remember your user information and also preferences over time. Please examine your Web web browser's guidelines to read more about these functions. Your authorization is voluntary; nevertheless, if you do not grant cookies being installed on your internet browser, Allergan might not have the ability to supply you full access to or all the capability of our internet sites. It likewise aids deliver cookie-content-wrapper certain info to you and tracks how sections of sites are used. Our Cryolipolysis equipment is the most recent version to the market with the current modern technology. We have actually collaborated with the suppliers to guarantee the very best cryolipolysis equipment.

There are a variety of cryolipolysis devices readily available, such as CoolSculpting, MOCOOL-A and 3d-lipo, which likewise make use of radiofrequency as well as ultrasound. Nonetheless, my experience exists with the CoolSculpting tool so I will certainly be reviewing this in more detail. Below's everything you require to learn about the treatment that's popular with celebs such as Gemma Collins and Khloe Kardashian. ' Bigger people tend to lose more inches, however we likewise have size 8 consumers who just wish to eliminate 2 or three inches of stubborn belly fat. hifu reading has actually come under hefty objection for stopping working to manage the cosmetic treatment industry. However within hours, the skin on Sarah's belly went from feeling numb and also white with cool to blisteringly hot as well as intense red. They assert results such as 50 percent of fat in the area being permanently destroyed in one session, with some customers seeing outcomes within two days.

Nevertheless Cryolipolysis is not a choice to a healthy balanced way of living. By incorporating Cryolipolysis with a healthy and balanced diet plan and exercise you will certainly enhance therapy outcomes.

Book a FREE no-obligation consultation with us today as well as allow us assist you achieve your excellent body. Cryolipolysis is not ideal for everyone, your Nurse will certainly recommend you on one of the most effective therapy for your areas. Do you have persistent pockets of fat that you would love to diminish? Would certainly you like to see the back of your muffin tops, spare tyre, or bingo wings? Cryolipolysis uses an efficient service without needing surgical procedure.

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[your-world-with-nct]

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝐟𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐫 — 𝐥𝐦𝐤

➵ pairing: mark x female reader

➵ genre: angst, suggestive, underground rapper au

➵ warnings: cursing, alcohol consumption, unhealthy relationship themes

➵ word count: 6.1k 

➵ summary: you didn’t know what you and Mark were; you weren’t enemies nor friends, you weren’t exes nor lovers. but what you did know was that you still loved Mark, and you never stopped loving him.

➵ a/n: happy belated birthday mark !! this is a part two to this blurb, and is inspired by the lyrics to billie eilish’s ‘party favor’. this is my first full fic, so i hope you all enjoy it and feel free to leave some feedback too!

August 2 - the significance of the date was written in the scars of your heart, forever known as, one: Mark’s birthday, and, two: what would’ve been yours and Mark’s two year anniversary. Ahh, Mark Lee.

The boy that became all of your firsts, kisses and the like; the boy that harnessed the musical talent of a professional or a prodigy, despite his small, underground career; the boy that was just a shy bean beneath his tough, street-wise exterior; the boy that knew your darkest secrets and told you his; the boy that promised you happiness till the end. But he was also that same boy that took advantage of you and lied to you; the boy who stole your heart, and never gave it back; the boy who was better at lyrics than love. He was such a mystery to you, like a code you couldn’t quite seem to decipher.

Even after the abrupt ending of your relationship, Mark was always there, with you, as if nothing had happened between you two. From the evenings where he was out cold after a long night at the bar, calling you to pick him up, to the early hours of the morning where he needed some feedback for his newly produced tracks, he somehow managed to keep you in his life, relying on him the way you relied on oxygen. Mark had you wrapped around his little finger - you would do anything just to get close to him again - and you both knew it.

There was one slight issue, though, which was the fact that you didn’t exactly know what you two were to each other. Yes, there may have been some occasions where Mark was drunk out of his mind, and you would both end up naked in his bed the next morning, like lovers.

But there were also times where he would ignore you for weeks on end, the only updates you received from him were Instagram posts with his rapper friends, paired with cryptic captions that were clearly targeting you, like exes.

However, no matter what Mark did, you would always come crawling back to him and his addictive love, because you were trapped in his trance, and didn’t want to be released from it either.

Once again, you were stuck in that limbo of Mark not acknowledging your existence for another month - or so you thought.

As you mindlessly shoved spoonfuls of Cheerios (your failed attempt at a healthy breakfast) into your mouth, you stared at the cursed date on your lockscreen, when, all of a sudden, your phone began ringing, the default tone echoing throughout your empty apartment. The name that flashed on the screen touched a nerve deep within you, as if your senses had been awakened; one of those senses being your infatuation with Mark, which was rekindling and creating sparks in your stomach as you hesitantly answered the call and put it on speakerphone.

“H-hello?” You hated the way your throat closed up and your voice dwindled into nothing whenever you spoke to him after eternities of no contact whatsoever.

“Oh, hey, Y/N! How’ve you been? I’ve not spoken to you in, like, what, I don’t know, it’s been, like, ages now, hasn’t it?” Mark leaped right into the conversation, starting it off strangely welcoming, too comfortable for your liking. You nodded slightly in response to his question, before quickly realising that he couldn’t see you right now.

“Uhh, yeah, it’s definitely been a while now,” you let out a timid squeak, which was originally meant to be a polite laugh, except the mere thought of Mark clouded your thoughts and refrained you from thinking straight, or acting normal.

Trying to distract yourself from your awkwardness, you absentmindedly started playing with your spoon, stirring it in the bowl- which now only contained some milk and tiny specks of Cheerios - while listening intently to the boy’s next words.

“So, you know how it’s my birthday today, right?” he paused to let you answer, to which you hummed a small ‘happy birthday’ in response, “Ahh, thanks, well, if you’re free tonight, I managed to privately this really cool nightclub from 9pm onwards and I was wondering if you wanted to join us?”

You’d be lying if you said that Mark’s invitation didn’t cause you to almost have a heart attack, so it took you awhile to process the information he had just thrown at you and come up with a decent reply, “Okay, first, of course I can come, I wouldn’t miss it for the world! Who do you think I am - it’s summer, I have no friends, and I think I’ve watched ‘Love, Simon’ one too many times this summer,” you joked.

Before you could continue, the Canadian boy’s bubbly giggles cut you off, as he sighed, saying, “Wow, you really haven’t changed that habit, I see.” The steady beat of your heart suddenly accelerated, the fact that your ex remembered your only hobby, an unusual one at that, which he found out about almost two years ago, sent shockwaves through your entire body.

“Mhm, yeah, that movie never gets old,” you joined in with his laughter, then carried on with what you were going to say once you heard the contagious chuckles quieten, “Also, where’s the nightclub? And who do you mean by ‘us’? I’m just curious, you know?”

You tried your best to not sound intimidated by the potential answers to your questions, but, with your knowledge of who Mark liked to surround himself with now, you couldn’t help but feel out of place around them.

“The nightclub is called ‘Sun and Moon’, it’s owned by one of my older friends, Taeil, and, it’s near the, uhhh, I think it’s close to that one shopping centre? But I can send you directions later, even if you can’t find it, you won’t miss it, it’s covered in neon lights and it’s massive! And, did I mention that Taeil hyung makes the best cocktails? I can’t wait for tonight!”

The boy seemed ultimately fascinated with the place from the way he spoke about it, and your lips curved into a small smile at his excitement. ‘Damn it,’ you thought to yourself, ‘why is he so cute? About things like this? Ughhh, I love him.’

Mark’s endless chatter continued while you pondered over how adorable he probably looked right now, “And, as for who’s coming, it’s only a small group of friends - the Dream boys, my best mate Yukhei and his Chinese buddies from uni, oh, and Chaeyoung and her non-celeb friends are coming too!”

The first few guests he listed were absolutely fine - Yukhei was your best friend, also a mutual friend of yours, and was the one that introduced you to Mark; his friends were strange, but bearable though; while the Dream boys were a group of young artists Mark had the opportunity to join, who were soon going to debut as rappers with him - however, your brows furrowed at the unfamiliar name, confusion written all over your face.

You weren’t jealous, no, just… curious as to who exactly this ‘Chaeyoung’ was, “Oh! Okay, that’s great! But, uhhh, who’s Chaeyoung? I’ve never heard that name before?” The boy let out a dreamy sigh, as if he was enchanted by the mere thought of this person, “Son Chaeyoung is a senior from our record label, better known as Beastie Babe, that’s her stage name.”

Despite his explanation, you were still baffled since you had no idea who she was. The weird, subconscious ‘huh?’ you let out told Mark that you still didn’t understand, so he elaborated on the matter, “I shit you not, she is the most talented, influential rapper of our generation! Her debut single ‘BDZ’ literally dominated both national and Western music charts and her recent collaboration with Cardi B helped skyrocket her to fame, and I’m under the same company as her? Like, I still can’t believe that that’s what we have the potential to become. She’s just so amazing-”

A greedy feeling engulfed your chest and your heart began thumping uncontrollably as Mark’s words of admiration filled your ears. Somehow, out of anger or whatnot, you had managed to throw your spoon across the kitchen, grunting quietly as he failed to stop rubbing in your face the fact that he was talking to other girls now.

“-the moment I walked into her recording studio instead of the Dreamies’ was the best moment of my entire life! We’ve actually been spending a lot of time with each other since then, and, you know what, Y/N? I used to have a huge fanboy crush on her but, uhhh, now that I actually know her, I think that I-I like her? Do you think I should say something tonight? Drunk Mark is definitely better with the ladies than Sober Mark,” he joked, stopping right after he heard silence on the other end of the phone.

You almost screamed at his last statement - “Drunk Mark is definitely better with the ladies than Sober Mark” - well, of fucking course he would say that, that’s exactly how he ended up asking you out on his birthday two years ago, while he was drunk.

‘How insensitive can that shitbag be! That’s our story, not yours and Chaeyoung’s!’ you internally yelled at him, as you refrained from hanging up without another word. Luckily, your self-control got the better of you and you said through gritted teeth, “Haha, defo, I’ll see you tonight then, Mark, good luck with that.”

And with that, you slammed your finger on the red button, aggressively hurling your phone at the couch and cursing Mark under your breath. “Just fuck around with my feelings then, why don’t you? While you’re at it, you may as well shove your successful love life into my face and ruin the smallest fragments of our relationship that we have left,” you mumbled, trudging over to your sofa to collect your phone.

Once you unlocked it, you went straight to Youtube, searching the name ‘Beastie Babe’ and playing her discography as you washed your limited amount of dishes. It crushed your already low self-esteem as you listened to the girl’s unique music, and you realised why Mark looked up to her so much and wanted to date her, she was so much better than you, more gorgeous, more gifted, she was the ultimate upgrade from you.

Those thoughts resurfaced once again as you stood in front of your full body mirror hours later, Chaeyoung’s catchy songs playing in the background, as you couldn’t help but binge all of her music videos to try and gage the chance you had against her when it came to Mark. Turns out you had zero chance.

That girl was literally world-famous, her albums were sold out everywhere, and she had designer brands chasing after her, desperate for celebrity endorsement. Her self-produced music was mesmerising, something you had never heard of before, and her rapping was rhythmic and fluid, while her vocals were beautifully melodic.

Not to mention, Chaeyoung was stunning - like her stage name suggested, she did have the facial structure of a ‘baby beast’ as her fans say, and her hair looked gorgeous no matter what style it was in, her chiseled cheekbones were always the main point of her look, along with her infamous, enticing caramel eyes.

Then, there was you. A college dropout who was surviving solely off of your parents’ riches until they could find a job for you in their expanding business, you were the ‘rich kid’ that everybody shamed.

You didn’t have anything like music in your blood, and you weren’t particularly talented at anything, unless pessimism was considered a talent. And you definitely weren’t gorgeous, you weren’t anything close to it, which was justified as you scrutinised your outfit in the mirror, that made you look even worse than usual.

Initially, what you had chosen for yourself and laid out on your bed looked ideal, the black and white checkered skirt complemented the tight, white off-the-shoulder top and the black, knee-length high heeled boots, while the baby pink leather jacket tied the whole thing together, adding a splash of colour to it.

Now that it was on you, you appeared like you were trying way too hard - your exaggerated makeup looked disgustingly dark, the top showed off all of your curves and rolls, the skirt was a little too short for your liking and portrayed a slutty image that you weren’t going for, and the boots were chunky and big, and didn’t seem to match the rest of the outfit as well as it did prior to when you put it on.

You looked horrendous and you knew it, but this was the only thing in your closet that was even close to what those other girls would be wearing, the only thing that made you at least look like you could fit in with them.

Before you could change anything about it, you glanced at the alarm clock perched on your bedside table, showing exactly ‘21:00’, which you decided was the perfect time to leave.

Usually, with events, you would either plan way ahead of time, and arrive punctual and prepared, or you’d turn up almost an hour late, with a half-assed outfit and an empty stomach.

This time, however, you didn’t know where you were headed, so you should’ve left early, but you got too paranoid, thinking up random instances where you would end up getting there before anyone else was, which would make you look like you were trying harder than ever to get Mark’s attention.

The car ride to Sun and Moon was a daunting one - not only because you were twisting and turning down unfamiliar roads, relying solely on Google Maps, but, because you were jittery with nerves and anxiety.

Just thinking of walking all alone into the club to see a clique of popular musicians and their wealthy friends made you shiver in your seat, and the fact that you were extremely anti-social and very much intimidated by most of the party’s attendees made it even worse.

Lights of almost every colour of the spectrum struck you as you parked your car by Sun and Moon, which was one of the most appealing and exciting clubs you had ever seen, not that you had been to many anyways. You braced yourself as you entered the place, breathing quickly and heavily, before pushing the door open to the booming, electrifying atmosphere.

You were immediately drawn to Mark’s alluring figure on the dance floor, jokingly grinding against one of his group members, Donghyuck, and you assumed that the both of them had some pre-party drinks already.

Mark’s black, patterned dress-shirt flowed down his upper body, the loose fabric of it accentuating the shape of his chest.

His wrists and neck were adorned in expensive brands of jewellery, his fingers laden with various silver rings, the golden glints of his watch twinkling under the bright, fluorescent lights - and his ebony locks were styled to exaggerate his forehead.

The matching black skinny jeans he wore made his legs look heavenly, it made it so hard for you to look away from him.

You shook your head, trying to rid yourself of the amorous thoughts flooding your mind, directing your eyes away from the attractive birthday boy to the rest of the room.

It seemed as if you were the last one to turn up, despite your worries, since you spotted Yukhei and his friends attacking the bar, and who you managed to identify as Chaeyoung and her friends surrounding and blatantly flirting with the Dreamies.

She was even more breathtaking in person - her platinum blonde bob framed her effortless makeup, which consisted of fuschia lips, long, luscious lashes, shimmery eyeshadow, and sparkling highlight, and her striking outfit, a lime green and black patterned tube top and matching bootleg pants, made her look magnificent.

If she wasn’t your ex-boyfriend’s current crush, she would’ve been yours, because, damn, she was hot.

You were broken from your daze when one of Yukhei’s best friends, Hendery, hollered your name and gestured for you to join them, after he noticed you standing blank and confused by the entrance of the club.

“Yoooo, Y/N!! It’s been ages since I last saw you and you look great, boo! Come here, you gorgeous little bitch,” Yukhei’s obnoxiously deafening voice reached you from the opposite side of the room, calling for you even though Hendery had already grasped your attention in the first place, causing you to shyly scurry towards his friend group, the heavy stares of almost everyone in the room following you.

As you made your way over to them, your best friend engulfed you into a bone-crushing hug, his long limbs entangling themselves around you, not letting you get a word in first. When he finally pulled away, it was then that you caught a full look at him.

“Thanks, Yukhei, I really wasn’t sure about this but I’m glad you like it. Also, you look absolutely amazing!! Like, it’s only been 3 months but I feel like you’ve gotten even taller,” you exclaimed, proceeding to compliment your friend’s stylish outfit.

The plain black-on-black aesthetic he was going for may have seemed boring, but he pulled it off so well - the tight-fitted, black long sleeve was paired with black leather pants and decorative chains hanging from his belt loops, and his newly dyed navy blue hair was slicked back to reveal his forehead.

He let out a squeaky laugh, one that only you managed to get from him, as he rested his arm on your head, commenting, “Yeah, I think I actually have gotten taller.” You rolled your eyes at his teasing, before interacting with Yukhei’s friends, who were a lot more welcoming than you expected.

You had only ever spoke to Hendery before, but Xiaojun, Yangyang, and Sicheng were all polite to you, contrary to their appearance and their reputation.

Yes, Yukhei and his mates were the typical rich playboys that you had previously assumed only existed in movies, with the designer loafers and belts they were wearing today.

But, they were just playful dumbasses who looked appealing to their classmates, and, to be honest, you enjoyed hanging out with them during the party, instead of lurking around the club, solitary and sombre, pining after Mark.

Oh yeah, Mark - the boys had been distracting you so well that you had forgotten about your ex that stood just four feet away from you, freestyle rapping with Jaemin and Jeno.

Surprisingly, you didn’t really mind your lack of interaction with him throughout the night. It had only been two hours and you thought that you would be so desperate to just talk to him and fix things with him, but, in reality, you were having a blast with Yukhei’s friends, listening to their uni gossip and discussing your favourite music at the moment, they made you feel comfortable and welcome, something that Mark and his friends always failed to do with you.

As you decided to have yet another cocktail, you approached the bartender, but, before you could even open your mouth, you felt a tap on your shoulder.

Although you hadn’t even seen the person, you knew exactly who it was, by the calloused fingers, from countless plucking of guitar strings, that grazed your skin, and the embarrassed clearing of his throat to gain your attention, you just sensed that Mark was stood right behind you.

Tentatively, you turned around to face the boy you dreaded to see, your cheeks flaming with rouge as he scratched his nape and locked eye contact with you. Your pulse quickened and you felt your stomach churning in your stomach, maybe it was just the drinks, or maybe it was his mere presence that excited and aroused you.

The scent of alcohol lingered on his body, and you could tell that it had already took a toll on him, by the wild twinkle in his eyes and the unsteadiness in his voice.

Despite that, Mark looked absolutely ineffable at that exact moment, the beads of sweat on his forehead sparkled underneath the colourful lights, and made him look ethereal and idyllic.

You panicked, creating multiple, unrealistic reasons as to why Mark wanted to talk to you right now, so the first thing your disoriented, intoxicated mind barfed up for you to say was, “Sincerely, happy birthday!”

The god-like creation that stood before you sniggered at your outburst, “Thanks, and thanks for coming too! I just wanted to ask if you could hold my watch for a bit?”

You almost choked at the simple request he had given you, clearly, he had other priorities, ones that didn’t include facing you and everything that had occured between you two since you had last spoken, excluding this morning, “Oh, oh yeah, uhhh, yeah, sure? How come?”

“Ahhh, Dahyun just challenged Jisung to a dance-off and he almost flipped in excitement, he dragged me and the rest of the Dreamies with him to go against Dahyun, Chaeyoung, and Tzuyu, and it’s already pretty hardcore, just look.”

Mark vaguely gestured to the dance floor, where Jeno was b-boying and Chenle was screeching to hype him up (even though the younger of the two was sober, he was still as energetic as ever) while Tzuyu was aggressively booing him and Chaeyoung was comically cracking her knuckles in preparation, “this is a Rolex Submariner and I do not wanna ruin it ‘cause of a dance-off, y’know?”

You laughed along with him, admiring the way he delicately removed the watch from his wrist, “Of course, I’ll keep it with me while you, uhhh, do that. By the way, where’d you get this? It looks pretty good quality.”

He tossed a glance at Yukhei, then back at you, “Xuxi got me this, he gave it to me last night so that I could wear it today! Did you think I bought it? I could never afford this on my own, ha!”

His drunken giggles were the only thing you heard and you couldn’t help but sigh in disappointment due to Mark’s casual manner around you.

You never thought that it would cross your mind, but you were beginning to wonder if he was completely and utterly over you this time.

“I’ll be back soon, just give it to me once we’re done,” he added, before making his way back to the dance floor where Renjun was doing some eccentric moves you had never seen before.

Even from afar, Yukhei noticed the dim aura that surrounded you, so he approached you, while you were ordering your new drink.

“What was that about? What did he say to you?” he questioned you, handing you the shot glass that the bartender had just placed on the surface. Accepting it, you took a swift swig of the drink, letting the liquid ease down your throat and settle in your stomach before answering, “He literally just wanted me to hold his watch, that’s it.”

“That’s it?”

“Yup, and I told him ‘happy birthday’, but, besides from that he just kinda, you know, avoided everything that I wanted to talk about, and ran away to them,” you nodded your head towards Mark, who was now freestyling against Chaeyoung, a knowing smirk plastered on his face.

Your best friend wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you close to his chest in a comforting way, to which you plainly let him do so, “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that, Y/N, as much as I love Mark, he’s been such a dick to you this entire time. I wish he would’ve listened to me when I told him to choose to either stop stringing you on or to pick up where you two left off.

“But, instead, he’s broken your heart time and time again, making you think that he still wants you, and needs you, when, in reality, Chaeyoung had him under her control the moment he met her, which was literally two weeks after you broke up, by the way. I wish that you’d look past that image Mark had built of himself in your head and heart, and see the real him.”

It was shocking to hear these wise words come from your currently drunk friend, as those weren’t the types of things he would usually say when he was clear-headed.

You wiggled out of his endearing embrace, audibly exhaling in frustration as your head was invaded with sudden realisations and epiphanies, “You’re right, surprisingly, I’ll try and talk to him later, maybe when I hand him his watch back. But, hopefully, this’ll be the last time I have to even look that boy in the eyes, I don’t think I can keep doing this any longer.”

The curves of Yukhei’s lips turned upwards into a proud smile, “That’s my girl! Now, how about you play this one drinking game that Sicheng found with us? Will that make you feel better?”

It did make you feel better, a lot better, and you were enjoying yourself so much that you had missed the fact that the impromptu dance battle had come to an end and its participants were carelessly swaying with one another, too exhausted to move their bodies properly.

You noticed that there were two specific people missing, however; it seemed that Mark and Chaeyoung had slipped out while you were playing with Yukhei, Sicheng, Hendery, Xiaojun, and Yangyang.

Only then did you recall that Mark’s exorbitant watch was still in the pocket of the pink jacket you had removed and left unattended on a chair. You excused yourself from the boys and ran to your jacket, retrieved the Rolex and proceeded to search for Mark to return it to him, and talk to him.

You had examined each and every bit of the club closely, yet Mark was nowhere to be seen, so you decided to explore the exterior, perhaps he needed to get something from his car, or something?

It was difficult to convince yourself that he hadn’t left to get some ‘alone time’ with Chaeyoung, which is what he had told his friends when he had done the same with you two years prior, but the idea of it kept recurring to you as you ventured out into the cold night. 

The similarities of your current situation and the time you had run away from Mark’s underground performance a week after your breakup were disturbingly accurate - except this time you were running towards him, instead of away from him, you were stronger now and wanted to face him, not cower away from him. 

He was making your confrontation pretty hard, though, because, at the moment, you couldn’t even find Mark, so you came to the conclusion of trying to call him. Multiple times. And, yet, he still didn’t answer, and you hadn’t advanced any further with it. You still didn’t give up, as you pressed his name in your phone again, and wandered down the street, glancing side to side every so often, just in case you had missed him.

“Hey, this is Mark, I’m busy at the moment but I’ll be back! Leave a message while you’re at it, I guess, haha,” Mark’s recorded voice echoed from the speakerphone yet again, you had heard it so many times that you had pretty much memorised his awkward little ramble. You sighed as the tone beeped for the sixth time in the past few minutes.

A disgruntled growl left you as you proceeded to search for the unreachable boy, your phone clutched in one hand while his watch was still in the other.

It was extremely tempting to just take it home with you and return it to him the following day - but if you were really going to permanently detach yourself from Mark like you promised yourself you would, you had to avoid anything and everything to do with him, or else you would give up and let yourself be pulled back into his trance.

After seeing the way he acted around Chaeyoung throughout the night, however, it wasn’t very likely that you’d come crawling back to him any time soon.

You pressed the contact name once again, holding your phone up to your ear hopefully, awaiting a response. Turning the corner as you neared your car, you laid eyes on a sight you wish you never had done, and you swore you almost dropped your mobile along with your jaw right there on the sidewalk.

There he was: pinned up against the graffitied wall of the narrow alleyway, arms coiled all over Chaeyoung’s waist, hips, and ass, lips locked with her swollen, red ones.

You couldn’t even gasp at the horrific scene, you were in another state of shock, and your entire body was quivering and recoiling in utter pain and heartbreak.

Tears pricked at your eyes the longer they lingered on the moaning mess that was Mark, but you couldn’t rip them away from him. “Shit, Chae, I think I love you,” he breathed out, as she left open-mouthed kisses from his jaw to his collarbone, her hands threading through his velvety locks.

That used to be you, kissing all down his neck; that used to be you, making his heart race and limbs melt into jelly; that used to be you, the one he said ‘I love you’ to.

“Hey, this is Mark, I’m busy at the moment but I’ll be back! Leave a message while you’re at it, I guess, haha,” the tone played again, making you jump out of your skin, ‘perfect timing, Y/N, what if he heard it, right now, coming from your phone!’ you huffed, dropping Mark’s watch on the ground near the alleyway, bolting away from the couple, towards your car, grabbing the handle and pulling it open as soon as you reached it.

As you slumped into the driver’s seat, you realised that you had accidentally pressed the voicemail button with your shaking finger, instead of the ‘end call’ button.

“Fuck, no, I don’t wanna record a voicemail to Mark,” you thought aloud, until a voice in your head suggested, ‘but won’t this be the last time you’ll ever speak to him?’

It was with that thought that the gears in your head began turning - it was right, this would be your last time talking to him, you could finally tell him all of the things on your mind, the emotions he made you feel, the burdens he put on you, and he didn’t even have to respond.

You could simply block him forever - because he wouldn’t care, right? You didn’t even need a response or an apology, all you wanted was for him to know what he put you through, what you had to suffer through because of him.

And it’s not like that would upset him, he didn’t care about you the way you cared about him, he didn’t need you the way you used to need him, since he had his (possibly) new girlfriend instead of you. So you decided to record your last message to him.

“Uhhh, okay, this is really weird but I’ll just get it over and done with. So, Mark, this is Y/N and by the time you get this, your number’ll probably be blocked, this is the last thing you’ll hear from me.

“I’m guessing you’re kinda confused right now, because you’re probably listening to this while you’re either drunk as fuck or hungover, but, long story short, I’m fucking done with you.

“Let me just remind you of what happened tonight, or last night, depending on when you’re hearing this. You invited me to your little celebration after, what, a month of not contacting me? And then, proceeded to tell me that your crush would be here, even though you knew all too well that we had too many loose ends that we hadn’t tied yet.

“Then, I get here, and suddenly you don’t even greet me, or acknowledge me, just like you had been doing for the past few weeks, while, of course, you’re glued to Chaeyoung’s side.

“Meanwhile, I was there, waiting to see you, since we hadn’t hung out normally since the break-up 3 months ago, and I knew, well, at least I thought I knew, that there was still a connection between us, or something.

“But, instead, I spent the entire night following Yukhei around and talking to his friends, and having the oh-so-great opportunity of watching you eye-fuck Chaeyoung the whole time. And, finally, when you do eventually notice me, you ask me to hold your Rolex? Really, Mark? I didn’t even get the chance to say anything more than ‘happy birthday’ to you.

“Now, I don’t know how you’re feeling about this whole thing, because, apparently, you’re now Chaeyoung’s newest boy toy, but, did you ever stop and think about how this has affected me? How this whole thing has affected me?

“Because, if you really didn’t notice Mark, I was still fucking in love with you - even after you left me - and I never knew why you gave up on us. Personally, I thought we were amazing together, I thought you were my soulmate, you were the only person that made me feel loved, the only person I loved, but, you didn’t seem to think so.

“Maybe it’s because you’re my first love, Mark, but I wasn’t yours; maybe it’s because I thought that nobody else could replace you; maybe it’s because of your web of lies that I got caught in - but I felt like it wasn’t over yet. It couldn’t be, we would find each other after a while and resume what we had, and we’d be together forever, wow, I know that’s cheesy, I think the alcohol’s getting to me now.

“Speaking of alcohol though, there was another reason why I thought that we could pick up where we left off.

“Don’t you remember all of those nights where you needed me to get you from the bar or the club, and drive you home? When you were so incapable of processing our history together that you just gave in, and let me fall in love with you all over again?

“Yeah, those nights gave me hope, hope that it wasn’t the drinks speaking for you the previous nights, it was you, and hope that you would realise what you were missing and come back to me.

“But, hoping is no good. You’ve actually gotta follow through with your hopes and make them come true. Yet, I couldn’t do that, since you always left me. You always disappeared without a trace, and then, suddenly, after three weeks or so, you’d be right back.

“But, you know, I see it now, I see the truth. You never really loved me, you weren’t lying when you said that, you loved the idea of me, the idea of having someone to rely on, the idea of someone else cleaning up your messes, the idea of someone to hook up with whenever you wanted.

“I saw that all throughout today, when you looked into Chaeyoung’s eyes, she pulled you in and you were lost in a swirl of lust, but whenever you looked into my eyes, you were so disconnected from me, and there was never any emotion.

“Mark, I’m not just your property, you can’t do whatever you want with me! I’m not your party favor, a mere birthday gift that gets thrown away after its purpose has been served.

“I’m Y/N and I’m not yours, Mark Lee, and I’m ashamed to say I ever was. If there’s one thing you were right about, though, it’s that ‘happiness is a lie, and it was only found in your trance’, but that’s because you didn’t make me feel true happiness.

“True happiness isn’t being manipulated into thinking that you make someone feel good and that it’s the only thing that makes them feel good, and that they needed you - true happiness is being free from the people that do that to you.

“I’m sorry, that I didn’t do what you wanted me to, I’m not blinded by your fake love anymore so you won’t be using me any time soon. Goodbye, Mark.”

And, with a few swift movements of your finger, Mark was gone from your phone, and from your life. He was nothing to you now, and you were no longer his - and, wow, you never knew that you would feel so proud to be able to say that.

[theatredirectors]

Derek Spencer

Hometown?

Southwest suburbs of Chicago.

Where are you now? 

Los Angeles. 

What's your current project?

Everyone Agrees it's About to Explode -- a devised, immersive, site-specific piece about a group of leftist revolutionaries. The audience is cast as new recruits in the collective, and witness the dissolution of the group firsthand. The show is devised along with a model that I've been developing with my company, Ceaseless Fun, for the last 4 years or so. 

Why and how did you get into theatre?

I auditioned to act in a Shakespeare play on a whim in my 3rd year of college, having no prior theater experience. I had fun but otherwise didn't think much of it. Then, the following year, I was asked to audition for a devised production of HamletMachine. It was on that production that I fell in love with the collaborative devising process. I didn't love acting, but I never felt so artistically capable as I did when I was working in a collaborative rehearsal room. I directed a small devised workshop production right before graduating, and knew that I had to keep directing, no matter what.

What is your directing dream project? 

I feel lucky to be in a position in which I am able to pursue whatever passion projects I have with my company. I often feel like my next project is always my dream project. I think the only limiting factor for us is money, so my dream project is probably something huge and spectacle-y. I've thought about a big, sandbox immersive production that adapts the Bosch painting The Garden of Earthly Delights, but makes it 1970's LA. So it's just this surreal, decadent, horrifying experience of celebrity and class-division. Maybe there are two floors, heaven, and hell, and mostly the audience is in hell, but they all get 15 minutes of fame to spend indulging the hedonism of heaven. The floors could be porous so you're always aware of what's happening on the other side. I want red carpets as bridges over pits of eternal torment, 1970’s cars as Burning Man-style monster vehicles, prosthetic-heavy demon-celebs, just truly insane shit. Maybe a pool with a swim-up bar like on cruise ships? I'd likely pull a lot of the text from the King James Bible. This probably makes me sound really tacky but I don't care, someone give me ten million dollars to make this happen.

What kind of theatre excites you? 

I like:

plays where philosophy is made emotional 

plays that play with space, acknowledge their surroundings and make suspension of disbelief unnecessary

plays that fit the container to the contents

plays that shock me out of passivity

plays that present something so abject or upsetting that I can't get it out of my head for days

plays where everyone thinks they know what the creators intended but all the interpretations are different

plays that show me myself, or help me understand how to be human, or make me feel more like a human

What do you want to change about theatre today?

I think theatre will only thrive as an art form if theatermakers aren't afraid to explore the medium and how it can be made relevant to young, contemporary audiences. 

What is your opinion on getting a directing MFA? 

I think I'd love the actual experience of being in grad school, but the cost worries me. Even "fully funded" programs still don't fully cover living expenses. It feels hard to know whether grad school will pay off professionally or if I'll graduate with similar career prospects and more debt. I've debate applying every year, but haven't yet pulled the trigger. 

Who are your theatrical heroes? 

Anne Bogart, Richard Schechner, Shunt, Third Rail Projects, Punchdrunk, Dimitris Papaioannou, Carolee Schneemann, Karen Finley, Artaud, Heiner Muller, Pete Brooks, anyone making free theater. 

Any advice for directors just starting out? 

See a lot, read a lot. Remember that you'll always be A Dumb Idiot Baby but also A Towering Egomaniac and that somehow you have to figure out when it's appropriate to be which. You don't have to accept every offer you get, sometimes offers are bad. Anyone can make theater you just need a room and 1 or more audience members and sometimes all that extra stuff gets in the way. Work with people that you would trust to raise your hypothetical children if you hypothetically die. Being an artist is an unreasonable and irresponsible decision to make under neo-liberalism unless you have a trust fund (then it's irresponsible for other reasons) and you'll have to grapple with that at some point so you might as well do it right now.

Plugs!

ceaselessfun.com

The run Everyone Agrees It's About to Explode has been cancelled due to the pandemic. We hope to remount as soon when everything is over! 

Follow Ceaseless Fun on IG for updates.

derekaspencer.com

IG: @ceaseless_fun or @abstract_sentimentalism 

Editor Note- updated in November 2020

[mattlassen]

My Ascent into MADness

          I’ve seen a lot of eulogies to MAD from contributors and fans alike the past week since the news broke that they wouldn’t be printing new material going forward. Yes, it is a loss for me as a MAD contributor but to be honest, I have been processing this loss and the end of MAD for a little while now. As Tom Richmond said so dead on, this was not something we didn’t see coming.

           I wrote some tweets as a tribute to MAD the day after the announcement went public but I feel I owe it more. (I really am a millennial - I thought a tweet or two was enough!) MAD was a big part of my life. It changed my life. It deserves more than Twitter. We all do!

           I was a writer and artist (occasionally) for MAD since I interned at the age of 19 but not many people know how I encountered MAD for the first time. I was born with a pencil in my hand as my mom says which makes me question what she was eating and drinking during pregnancy. I was always drawing and dreamed of being a comic strip artist after my dream of being a basketball star went by the waist side when everyone got taller and left me well by their waist side! During high school, my family took a trip to California and being big fans of Peanuts (my mom and I), we visited the Charles Schulz Museum in Santa Rosa. It was an amazing experience. We went around the whole museum while my dad and brother tailed off to let my mom and I experience it more in-depth at our leisure. When I met up with my dad later, he said “I was sitting in on this artist talk and the guy is pretty good. Maybe you’d be interested.” We went in and Tom Richmond was doing a talk about caricatures. They were amazing. Funny, exaggerated and completely dead on. You knew who it was right away! The perfect caricature.

           As the talk ended, Tom showed the opening spread artwork he just finished for MAD Magazine for the movie, Spiderman 2. Wow. Caricatures, amazing line, color and backgrounds together. Oh and stupidity! Spiderman’s pants were coming down so his underwear was showing, Doc Ock had big bandages on his tentacles and there was a paper that said “Man bites Dog, Dog sues.” The best was a spider web coming from the middle of Spiderman’s legs which I remember Tom saying, “Yeah, I’m surprised I got away with that one.” I left amazed but also thinking I can’t draw like that. Uh-oh.

           The museum announced that they would be doing a caricature workshop with Tom in about five minutes upstairs for free. We all went with a little encouragement from my parents. Tom started by asking for a volunteer that he could do a caricature demonstration of. My parents were very insistent that I do it, but being a teenager at the time (who looked quite younger than his actual age, short and scrawny!), I didn’t want to. I was picked and had to go up in front of everyone for an artist to pick apart my face and draw me. Yay! I was a good sport and a very jokey guy so I can take a joke just like I dished them out. He drew me on chart paper with big muscles and a mom tattoo because hell, my mom was the whole reason he was drawing me! I left the workshop with a caricature in my hand and MAD Magazine in my head. I need to get the magazine that had this Spiderman art in it. Many years later after hanging and talking to Tom on multiple MAD occasions as contributors, I told him this story at a party after a beer or two. He was a bit surprised to say the least.

           We went to a mall shortly afterwards and I was searching for the MAD art in the newsstands but it wasn’t out yet. I settled for the latest issue and was amazed by the diverse amazing artwork in the magazine. Since I met Richmond, I was fascinated with his work and it really stood out but there were other guys that were cool too like Mort Drucker, Hermann Mejia, Tom Bunk and John Caldwell (my all-time favorite since he was much goofier looking and simplified with his artwork just like I liked to draw!) Plus, he had this squiggle in his line which was intriguing. How? Why?

           I became obsessed with MAD for the art. I didn’t read it as much as I should have early on but I was just obsessed with the artwork as a budding cartoonist. The words were secondary to me. It was an art magazine. I drew everything in high school with chicken fat - gags on top of gags. My MAD subscription and obsession continued when I entered college. I went on the MAD website and saw they had internships in the New York offices for art and editorial. I was in no way a graphic design person. I hated it. Type and layout was boring. I wanted to be a cartoonist! I applied for both art and editorial. I wrote and mocked up my own outtakes from different TV shows such as The Office, Muppets etc. which was a recurring feature in the magazine at the time. It was something fun to do on a rainy Saturday night. I submitted and thought nothing of it. I wasn’t going to get it. Another summer doing art and taking summer classes. Yay.

            I checked my email on a slow Monday morning and to my astonishment, there was an email from Amy V. at MAD offering me an editorial internship. I was stunned. I told my family and they were ecstatic for me and soon I was starting my first day as a MAD intern. It was insane. The only magazine, I liked and I was going to work there. I got there and we had a morning staff meeting first thing. The whole staff (which wasn’t big at all!) and the four interns (two editorial and two art). I was nervous but was eased when the staff was grilling us about the magazine and I was the only one answering everything. I remember art leaving after giving their report on the status of their pieces and what they needed etc. John Ficarra, the editor (and best Benjamin Franklin impersonator I’ve ever met) took a piece of paper and wrote down what Michael and I would be doing. I got a big speech from my family about interns and how I shouldn’t expect much, I’m going to get coffee and do meaningless jobs that others didn’t want to do etc. John said “Okay, you’ll be writing fundalini pieces in house such as “The Godfrey Report”, “Celebrity Cause of Death Betting Odds” - give us a list of celebs to approve before you start and Fundalini asks “What If…?” etc.” He also said, we will have brainstorming writing sessions where you will work with us etc. I don’t think I blinked for the two minutes he was talking. Then he said, Dave will show you your office and get you guys set up. We had an office. We had our own desks. We had our own computers, phones. What?! Where was the coffee I needed to get them?

            We went right to writing, Michael and I. We came up with a bunch of celebrities etc. and got to know each other. I was always an art person and a little funny in classrooms and parties but never would I think of myself as a writer. We got a bunch of issues from the storage closet and focused in on the material we had to write specifically. I was seeing the magazine in a completely different light. It was incredibly smart and funny. Why wasn’t I reading this cover to cover all the time? We started writing together and putting out stupid jokes to try to make each other laugh. Sometimes successfully and most of the time, not. The soul crushing silence became the most dreaded thing in my life. The joke didn’t land and you just embarrassed yourself. That writing session was broken up by a call to come to the editor’s office because Al Jaffee was there dropping off the new Fold In. What?! This day is getting more surreal. That was cool is an understatement. Eventually, throughout the days at MAD, Michael and I wrote by ourselves and didn’t really collaborate on any pieces mostly because we had different comedy sensibilities and it was easier to write by ourselves. I started writing all day long and printing out my pieces to read and revise on my commute home.

            I got to sit in on fold in meetings, department writing sessions, general pitch meetings from writer submissions and what direction they wanted to go with content. I quickly figured out that I wasn’t as quick and funny as everyone else thought I was. These guys have been doing it for decades. Damn were they good! My first department writing meeting, they had an article about Fast Food and they needed a fake department name. I didn’t even get to process what the article was and the editor says “When Grease Meets West?” to which he is interrupted by Charlie singing “All We Are Sayyyyinnnnggg…Is Give Grease a Chance.” I was dumbfounded, out of my element and intimidated. I need to get better and quick.  

            As the six-week internship went on, I wrote so many pitches and submissions. I wrote three or four pages of Godfrey Reports (maybe nine got in), multiple Celebrity Cause of Death Betting Odds (three or so that got printed), so so many what ifs, that were off the mark. I loved it there! The people were funny, they were welcoming and better yet, they were kind and nurturing. They told you what worked and didn’t work. They didn’t care who had the best idea or the funniest line in the room, they liked that it was the best and funniest! It was comedy boot camp and you wanted to work there forever.

             We helped write fundalini pieces, department titles, articles in house, even an article introduction and so much more. I was like a staff member. I would get there early and leave later than I needed to. I met legends and heroes of mine when they would visit the office including Al Jaffee, John Caldwell, Teresa Burns Parkhurst, ironically, Tom Richmond and Hermann Mejiia among others. We got to go through original art for auction (where I found three Don Martins which they had to pry from my hands before I drooled on them), got to admire and examine Mort Drucker original pages that he just fed ex’ed in for a new parody with the staff, see the construction of a cover putting Obama and Alfred together (like 20 or 30 different versions) and the same for the Knockout Obama, Hillary piece both by Mark Frederickson. I felt like a staff member and left being assigned an editor to submit to and now you are a contributing writer, if you want to be. Submit anything you want. Now I’m a writer. They didn’t know who I was six weeks before. I’m just a college kid. I’m a contributor now? That was the best thing about MAD, they didn’t care what else you did for other people, they wondered what could you do for us. Don’t show me work you did for other people, show me a piece you wrote specifically for us. They looked at potential and built up talent to a new level.

            I wrote and wrote and there was a lot of near sales but a lot of not quites. I sold to MAD Kids before Christmas. That was a cool Christmas gift. In January, the magazine lays off three staff members and goes quarterly. There’s a famous Stephan Pastis line that I always remember and works best here “I finally get to play for the Lakers and the stadium is collapsing underneath us.” I came back the next summer and interned in the art department. Now, I’m getting to know people I knew but didn’t work with closely at all. Same old MAD but completely different. Instead of being with the editorial guys, I was with the art guys, Ryan, Sam and Doug. All smart, funny and amazing guys themselves. I came right into a deadline for the magazine and was put to Photoshopping different things. I was then tasked with restoring fold ins for a upcoming fold in collection. The previous intern did about ten or so which meant we were a long way away from completion. Over the next six weeks, I restored over 450 or so fold ins for the book, got to have lunch with and meet more artists and writers including Harry North, Jason Chatfield, Shannon Wheeler etc. and go through more original artwork to send back to the artists. Any cartoonists dream. I think Adam Cooke and Michael Slaubaugh visited that summer too! During this time, I wrote a piece on the weekend and submitted it to Dave Croatto, my editor, to which they eventually bought! Now I was actually a contributor to MAD! Not in house pieces but as a writer.

            After leaving MAD as an art intern, I looked for other places to intern/write for/work for. I knew MAD wasn’t going to pay the bills! I interviewed at The Onion where they told me I would hate working there after working at MAD because they didn’t care if it was the funniest idea or line in the room, if an intern said it they would ignore it. Nothing was like MAD and would be like it. I became very loyal to MAD. I only wrote for them. I didn’t consider myself a comedian, I was just a writer for MAD and MAD only. I temped after college in the editorial department for a month (literally, the day after my last final ever and took a day off for graduation!) We started the blog, established daily posting and internet presence through the current events that was happening. I started submitting more and selling on a more consistent basis. I valued their opinions and their direction. Nothing made me happier than seeing a MAD guy on the floor of a convention or visiting the office once or twice a year. They changed my career and the way I looked at things by just giving a 19-year-old kid a chance and some criticism and encouragement. They let me submit cartoons and I started to sell those too!

           I continued to write for the magazine and even got a page in their new book, Inside MAD, to write about MAD as a contributor. I did other freelance art jobs and eventually went back to graduate school to become an art teacher. Even throughout the four years I’ve been teaching, I continued to contribute and write consistently for the magazine. There are too many stories and memories to recount. (Believe me, this could be much longer!) When MAD announced they were moving to California, I went into mourning. My buddies were leaving. There were talks for years about this happening and they resisted as much as they could. I didn’t know what was going to be next for them and the magazine. I wanted to continue writing because it was my outlet and a nice hobby for me to destress from life and my full time gig of teaching cartooning. It wasn’t a job for me, it was fun!

           The new year came and it meant starting over with a new staff. It was hard. I tried but my heart wasn’t in it as much as when the New York staff was there. I wrote pieces and sold pieces (many that didn’t get printed because of the shortened run) but contributed none the less. As my job got more intense, I wrote less and less and without the same relationship, I had in the past my motivation folded a little bit before MAD did. My mourning period has lasted for a year and a half so the end of MAD wasn’t such a surprise or as much of a loss as it would have been otherwise for me. It still is a loss, don’t get me wrong but less so. This isn’t any slight to the West Coast MAD staff at all. It was me, not them. MAD became a fun hobby for me. Not my sole income and my way of life. I did it because I had the ideas and I enjoyed the people and the work. Plenty of people make fun of politicians, celebrities and the stupidity of the life but I occasionally got paid for it.

            I’ve been asked if I will try to get into other publications. I don’t know. Maybe. You might just see more MAD like pieces in my own webcomics and cartoons. The influence will be there forever and I hope people can clearly see that through the bad puns, the political stupidity and the irony.

            MAD is the cartooning and comedy bible. I loved the art as a cartoonist and grew to love the writing and minds behind everything as a contributing writer. My art and views are completely changed by my experiences working and being a MAD idiot. Everything I do is so idea based now because of MAD and being a MAD writer. They weren’t afraid of new blood or printing work from an unknown artist or writer. They gave chances and crafted things that were truly unique. I thank them for changing my life and letting me be a part of theirs and their legacy for the past decade. All of the amazing people and contributors I have met because of it is amazing. I will miss the occasions we would meet, share a joke or even lament about things. My life would be something very different if I didn’t go to a museum in Santa Rosa, if I didn’t submit an internship application and if I didn’t pick up a MAD Magazine on vacation. I would be called an idiot in different, not so surprising and endearing contexts and I wouldn’t have an Alfred sized hole in me today. I’m proud to sound off like I have to other MAD NY staffers and contributors in our coded communications.

Forever MAD